Probably the most hostile reactions I’ve had to my pro-life work come as a result of my decision to abstain from any of the products associated with abortion funding, from hotels to food, to products created by the research from Senomyx, whose work has used a cell line from the kidney of an aborted baby to test flavor receptors for products sold by PepsiCo, Frito Lay, Kraft, and others. I’ve been called stupid, I’ve been laughed at, and I’ve been disbelieved. Ultimately, I’ve had criticism at boycotting anything because “it can’t really make a difference.” What I want to propose to you in a new paradigm on viewing things such as product boycotts, that it makes a spiritual difference.

As Christians Jesus calls us to fast. He says “When you fast…” (Mat. 6:16),  He doesn’t say “If you feel like fasting.” It’s a basic of Christianity 101 that we will fast. Fasting isn’t a work that is designed to please God, but a tool that tenderizes our heart as we seek Him deeper and gives us more intimacy with Him in the journey.

I’ll be honest and say that I sometimes wonder what good it does to change many of my grocery shopping habits or when I respond to the knowledge of a company funding pro-abortion causes by changing where I stay in a hotel or buy coffee or say no to the Girl Scout cookies or refuse to use PayPal–even drive an hour away for a doctor–all because of abortion ties. My life has become very inconvenient since I began living this way. Do I really think that my buying a different brand of chocolate chip to make my Christmas fudge is going to impact Nestlé’s profits? Of course not! So why don’t I buy it? If it doesn’t really matter, if the chips weren’t even made with that flavoring, what’s the difference?

The difference is that I feel the Lord’s pleasure when I say no. My heart becomes tenderized to Him. I get frustrated, and the name calling and laughing hurts, but then I feel the Lord seeing my quiet little decision to look at another brand. I’m not making a statement to Nestle but a declaration of love for Jesus.

When criticism came, I didn’t really have an answer that made a lot of sense, except between Jesus and me. I know it matters, but no, I don’t think I am impacting the economy with my purchases as a single woman. But it impacts my heart.

It was a few months ago that as I heard the song “Do You Know the Way You Move Me” when the Lord spoke to my heart about these choices. I wept as I realized I moved His heart with my small decisions. I moved His heart even when I was frustrated that I couldn’t choose that hotel or drink that soft drink. I moved His heart not because I was affecting the economy but because I loved Him more.

Literally, I am fasting. I am choosing the food of heaven over the goods (and gods) of this earth.

You won’t find me with a sign outside PepsiCo or Nestle. I’m not trying to protest; I’m trying to please God. I’m trying to love Jesus better and when I give up a worldly pleasures, I feel His pleasure on me more than ever.

What makes Bound4LIFE different from some pro-life groups is that we are built on prayer. Our saying at a Siege, where we stand with Life Tape is “it’s not a protest; it's a prayer meeting.” So I would say in regards to my decisions, “it’s not a boycott; it’s a fast.”

I’ve been missing some of my favorite foods for many months now. I’ve missed opportunities to stay in cheap and convenient hotels. I’ve chosen to avoid many pleasures. I get “hunger pains,” and I don’t like it always, and I have no idea if it will end anytime soon. I may be an old lady living off locusts and wild honey in the desert, but I’m okay with that because Jesus is.